Month: December 2012

Final Dystopian Story

December 6, 2012 / / 0 Comments

There are a number of examples of very strong personal and creative expression in this piece, Sam.

I’m going to focus (by changing their colour to red) on the phrases and sentences that I feel may need a little more work. Often they are correct, but unclear or even simply clumsy. If you don’t know what I think is wrong, or don’t agree, feel free to discuss it in a comment on this page.

It was a dark and dingy day and it was pouring with rain. Everybody stayed in their homes and looked solemnly outside of the window and did not set a foot out of the front door. Beyond the Houses of Parliament, a gigantic mansion stood firm containing a master mind observing his city.

The sudden flush of sorrow lingered in the city streets until one man stood up to protest against the leaders.”Let us not sit in our homes pulling faces and watching the television. Our city was a comforting place and very peaceful, but do not let the power of our city’s pain and tribulation come upon us but let our freedom rise from the dead.”

He wondered down the middle of the road, knocking at each door and was always met by a man or a woman but this confrontation troubled his faith in the people of this city. In front of him stood the vicious guards of this city, he gave up with passion because of what he had done.  The air which was clear smelt of obnoxious food. He felt the loss of his city’s freedom struggling to enter,he heard the monstrous sound of his heart stampeding enormously,the city will gradually die with excruciating pain unless he could convince the guards to join him in a force to make our city a better place for everyone.“Lets say that you are me and your city has been totally demolished by an evil genius and many of his companions with lasers and mutant powers,what would you do? Other people are getting terrorised  by aliens and your just going to standing caging people in prison cells.Well, that is what I’m trying to do without you guards putting a burden on my back so are you in or are you not?

How is the mood set in chapter 1 of Haroun?

March 6, 2015 / / 1 Comment

 

In the story of Haroun, the mood is set as a sad one.This is because it says in the first sentence ‘, a sad city, a city so ruinously sad that it had forgotten its name. ‘ meaning the city is not a great place to live in. In addition to this it also states, ‘in which sadness was actually manufactured’ the author is using personification to give the reader/s more detail, humour and a better explanation of what is happening in the first paragraph. It also says soon after that, ‘(maybe the sadness of the city finally crept in through their windows)’, this is also an example of personification because it says crept in through their windows and.

Haroun and his family had been the only happy family in the city if not country.This was because of him and his family being very happy because his dad is a very happy story teller and a his mum is a very happy singer which keeps their family happy.This is why haroun and his family are so happy (compared to everyone else) in the city of Alifbay.                                                         On the other hand, later on his mum leaves…   What will happen next?????…….

Salman Rushdie uses a type of fairy- tale beginning to start us off for the upcoming events.’there was once’ is what he starts us off with. Usually in a fairy tale you start it with ‘once upon a time’ or ‘there was once’ or even ‘in a land far far away’ this is because when one person starts something cool you tend to copy it to make yours even better.This is why the author ‘Salman Rushdie’ uses ‘ there was once ‘… As a beginning.

In addition to my first paragraph, it states that Rashid has two different names one being the ‘ocean of notions’ and the other being ‘the shah of blah’.you probably would have thought that he would have no rivals before you complete the first few pages. But this is only because of his explanation.